Don't Be Afraid To Be Who You Are - Isle Side

[missrecalled_mods]

The Rain Rain Rain Came Down Down Down

Just over a week after the Isle visit people would find themselves drawn outside. The weather was finally getting warmer, but that wasn't all of it. A strange foul smelling - and fairly toxic - mold had begun growing in some of the classrooms. Thankfully not the ones where people were sleeping but it was still enough to make it unpleasant to remain indoors. Some might blame the growth of the mold on a certain obsessive compulsive cleaner, though others might say that he just discovered it and accidentally gave it access to oxygen and such.

Whichever the reason, sleeping outside for a few days was sounding like a better and better plan with every passing minute. Even the drizzling weather couldn't make the indoors terribly appealing for anyone with a sense of smell.

And it was over night on one such night that the rain was... different. Warmer and a bit tingly. And some people would awaken quite a bit older than when they fell asleep, perhaps. Their memories might have caught up with their age, or might come to them slowly. However it happens, there might be some very confusing moments as those who seemed to be young just a moment before are now... less so.

Gift In Time Gift In Time Nary A Reason Nary A Rhyme Gift In Time!

Weirdly, there was something good to come not long after the rain. In addition to aging some folks up, it also seemed to wash away the worst of the mold, allowing people to return indoors once more. And each of them would find, soon after, in some place that they considered theirs... a small gift. It was rare that positive things happened on the Isle, but perhaps this was a sign of things to come.

Or perhaps even a broken clock is right once in a blue moon...

Comments

[ubuntu_programmer]

Ian leaned back. "The problem is pretty much found in your story. Until that moment comes... Sun, Chara, you, me, anyone really... especially anyone who has ever been betrayed before or who has betrayed someone themselves... we all have that little voice in our heads reminding ourselves that the dedication to stand with someone else is untested. But if we're lucky, there never is a chance to test it. And for some of us, that is a blade that cuts no matter what happens. There is never anything where someone needs to stand with you, so you always doubt if they will... or something that bad happens and they do stand with you... and you forever blame yourself that they got burned in your fire. Sometimes being alive... just that, just being alive... is really really difficult."

Ian ran a hand through their hair. "With Chara... on the surface it is easier, they're a child. So you can stand between them and danger more without doing damage, and even a child who has been betrayed as much as Chara has... There is still the chance that they want to believe more than they are afraid to. But for someone like Sun..." Someone like Ian as well, to a lesser degree these days. As a teen though...

"For someone like Sun... he may find it hard to believe. Because like you he's been betrayed before. It becomes hard to trust when there is no proof. And when there is proof there is always guilt that the person who stood with you got hurt possibly. Because of you. And also guilt at the relief you feel that they proved trust worthy because then you feel guilty for ever having doubted them. Sometimes... it feels easier to try and keep a distance to keep from those thoughts. To keep others safe from the fires you face and to keep yourself safe from the fear of betrayal and the guilt if it doesn't come. It... isn't the most fun ride ever. But that distance... it isn't good either. It is so lonely it is painful, and the guilt is still there. All the people you hurt trying to protect yourself by pushing them away."

"So far... I've only found two things that truly help, and neither of them is easy. Time is one. Patience is the other. No matter what you or I do for Sun, or each other even... it isn't going to be as easy as we might hope for the person we want to be there for to be able to fully trust that we will stand with them, no matter how much they want to trust. I've... I've pushed so many people away so many times, only to desperately try to claw them back because alone is just so... empty. We need to have patience with them. And... with ourselves. Life is messy. No matter what species or race or marginalized group we come from... being alive is hard work. And...."

They winced. "And I just went way off field on a tangent and lost my point in the middle there. Sorry. The point I was trying to make was that I believe you when you say you'll be there to stand with Sun and Chara. But my believing it doesn't mean they will. And them wanting to believe doesn't mean they will either. And sometimes it can be hard to not be believed, not be trusted... Sometimes it is harder to stand there at the side of someone at war with themselves than you think you can take. And... Yeah, I've lost my point again. Really wishing Ben were here right now."

[mist_the_point]

Foulques shook his head. "You speak from your heart," he said. "While such often lacks clarity by its very nature, it has far more truth in it if one is willing to listen. And while I can't claim to know your friend and what he might say, I find I prefer speaking to one who carries some of the same hard truths deep in their bones. I've already told you more than I've told most in this world, because I would not lay such a burden on the shoulders of one who did not know how to bear it."

He considered for a moment, frowning thoughtfully. "Chara, whatever may have happened to them, is a child, and sees the world through a child's eyes. Things are either one thing or the other, with little space for nuance. All humans are wicked, and all monsters good, and the like. You and I know that the world and the people who inhabit it are never so simple, but they are not yet quite able to make those distinctions. This will likely make convincing them easier in some ways, but more difficult in others."

"Meanwhile, Sun, for all the oddities his nature presents, has the understanding of an adult. What he lacks is experience, and that, at least, we can provide. We can help him learn to understand that simply because things are a certain way doesn't mean that they should be. Though like many tasks, that is like to be easier said than done."

He sighed. "Time, and patience, as you said; one step at a time. Though in different ways in all cases, including my own. But for good or ill, I'm used to not being believed or trusted, often with little to no reason. At least here, I know tis not likely to be done out of malice. A cold comfort, perhaps, but a comfort nonetheless."